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Heinessights: Wisdom For the Ages

By Matthew Heines

Heinessights: Wisdom For the Ages

Special China Virus Edition!

 

Heinessights are always 20/20 and the latest China Virus Edition of Heinessights: Wisdom for the Ages is certainly no exception. With a whole new chapter of China Virus jokes, and a slew of new one liners added to our other chapters, this is a book you cannot afford to miss.

★ “Southern Governors have issued edicts to their respective states; “She was wearing a mask,” is still not legal grounds for having sex with your sister.

◆ Whether it’s advice on dating, the military,  politics or the history of town names in Washington State, Heinessights: Wisdom for the Ages, will not only keep you amused, it will keep your friends amused as well as you pass these quips, witticisms and dry observations off as your own.

◆ Be the first at your next picnic, church social or neighborhood race riot to get these knee-slappers going.

◆ Be the first to say, “I told you. Heinessights are always 20/20!”

★ In the Army: “In the 82nd Airborne, they said everyone should be, “high and tight.” It took a long time before I realized they were talking about my hair and not my underwear.”

★ Equality in Seattle: ”Smart or stupid, rich or poor, Seattle traffic makes everyone equal-equally screwed that is.”

★ Dating: “I once dated someone who told me she was a showgirl. When it came to our dates, she never showed.”

★ Washington State Place Names: Quilcene – What happens when your porcupine throws a tantrum.

Over one hundred pages of jokes, puns and gaffs at your fingertips. Just scroll up and click the Add to Cart Button to get your party started now.

“It is better to laugh at someone then to laugh with them.”  – Ancient Chinese Secret Proverb

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